Here’s your “Al Gore Global Warming Question of the Day:”

Is it time to panic?

If you’re a Cambridge Greenie who’s just broken one of your environmentally friendly compact fluorescent bulbs in the kids’ playroom - absolutely.

If you’re a rational person who can actually read a thermometer - not so much.

I fall into the second category, which is why I don’t spend $10 on mediocre, mercury-filled deathsticks known as CFLs. A recent front-page story in USA Today pointed out that these “spaghetti bulbs” as they’re sometimes known, give off lousy, unflattering light; don’t work with dimmer or three-way switches; and can’t handle heat or cold well.

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And those are the opinions of people who like them.

Global panic-attackers support CFLs because they use about one-third less electricity. (They also require about one-third more energy to manufacture and transport, but let’s not confuse the nice liberals with math.) I suspect government bureaucrats like CFLs because they’re annoying, ugly and don’t work very well.

The bulbs, I mean.

Then there’s the mercury issue. The activist group Environmental Defense calls mercury “one of the most poisonous forms of pollution” and “a highly toxic heavy metal that can cause brain damage.” They also support government mandates requiring more CFLs.

Apparently, global warming kooks don’t worry about brain damage. For them it’s a pre-existing condition.

But the rest of us might want to read the following guidelines from the Maine Department of Environmental Protection on what to do if a CFL breaks before we blow $10 on a light bulb:

“First, do not vacuum up the mess, because that will spread the mercury vapor and dust and potentially contaminate the vacuum. Keep the kids and pets away. Ventilate the area by opening windows for 15 minutes. Wearing rubber gloves, pick up the larger pieces of glass and place them in something like a glass jar with a metal, screw-top lid. (Plastic jars will not work.)

“Now pat the area with the sticky side of duct tape. Finally, wipe up the area with a damp paper towel or wet wipe. Continue to ventilate the room for several hours, and wash your hands and face.”

The DEP also recommends throwing out your carpet if it’s been contaminated by your broken bulb.

Shouldn’t we be absolutely sure about the global warming crisis before we start buying our kids “WMD-Brand” night lights?

Instead, there is mounting scientific evidence that the global warming panic isn’t a mere overreaction, it’s pure meteorological nonsense.

Full article here.